I started my master this year and with it a new chapter in my life.

I lost control of myself. My anxiety took over and then depression took advantage. I lost a dear person. I lost half of me.

I’m being followed by two doctors. But I know that’s just to make me feel a little better, something to make me believe I’m getting better. I’m not, it’s just a distraction.

I feel sad everyday, I cry everyday. I desperate everyday.

This happens to me from time to time. Deep sad stages that get me to another level. But this one is just being so hard on me… I actually thought about killing myself. I’m not sure yet. I just know I need some kind of help. Doctors are not helping. I don’t have friends. My family just thinks I’m stupid. My bf can’t take of me all alone…I don’t want to feel like I need help but I need.

Sorry.

Advertisements

4 thoughts on “

  1. We sometimes feel isolated but in truth we are never alone. Depression can, as you know make you isolate yourself but pick up the phone and the samartin’s will talk as long as you want. Smile at a person and they will smile back, ask for help, you are in need of remembering how to take that first step. But people care and when you remember all the good things. Then you can say aloud as many good things you are greatful for. .. thank you for waking me, for the air i breathe for a place to shelter me etc… the more good things you recall out loud the bigger your smile. The easier it will become. I don’t know you but I will be cheering you through hoping you hear, hoping you try if not for you, maybe you can take the step for me. This person you do not know but who truly cares and would be devastated if anything bad happened to you.
    Keen tryi ng please. 😇

    Liked by 1 person

Leave a Reply

Fill in your details below or click an icon to log in:

WordPress.com Logo

You are commenting using your WordPress.com account. Log Out / Change )

Twitter picture

You are commenting using your Twitter account. Log Out / Change )

Facebook photo

You are commenting using your Facebook account. Log Out / Change )

Google+ photo

You are commenting using your Google+ account. Log Out / Change )

Connecting to %s