Home for Christmas

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I’m home for christmas. And this is our tree,the same one since forever.

I don’t like the pressure I feel these days, I get very anxious maybe because something is expected from me, feelings, gifts, love..don’t know. But this time of year I always feel a little chill on my stomach, it’s a week full of christmas stuff and talking about the new year and planning things, food, clothes and I get truly overwhelmed and sad sometimes. And I just want to lock myself inside a room and wait for all to be over.

The one thing I like is being with my family. I like the 25th and the 1st. Those are the days when everyone’s home, watching TV together, eating candies, playing with the new toys… I think it’s the waiting for the midnight that really gets to me!! is it weird?

I like buying gifts! And this year I had to control myself X)

Show me your christmas trees!! =)

Merry Christmas!!

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#6

she’s playing with soap bubbles.

sitting by the window. observes.

admires the bubbles that fades into the air.

she’s thinking. reflecting.

it’s sad. it’s joyful. what she’s thinking about. it makes her mood change. and play with soap bubbles.

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the image’s not mine.

 

TWR

I’m stupid. And so are you.

why are we such stupid people?

We want what we can’t have. We desire it when it’s lost. We’re never happy.

 

I hate myself everyday. ‘Cause I cry for no reason, ’cause I’m laughing when I shouldn’t. ‘Cause I get angry and want to cut my skin.

 

for no reason!

 

And I want to be honest, sincere, don’t leave things unsaid. But I feel stupid.

 

 

Isn’t it great when you recognize someone’s handwritting?

Sometimes I find a paper inside a notebook or around the house and recognize the handwritting and I love to know that it’s my mother’s or my boyfriend’s or my best friend’s, a giant smile instantly takes over my face :p

I don’t like people, I don’t like dealing with them but I love them. I love the complexity and I love to “study” and learn how a person operates. But it sucks ’cause I can’t controle it. Sometimes I know that person better than they know themselves. It sucks.

Some days I like to hang out and “study” people other days I just want to kill people and not being a person. And I’m really not, I don’t like being human so I’m a creature. I don’t hide who I am,never did,probably the reason why I never had friends and was always left out and called the anti-social one or the weird one or the different one. O.O

But hey, I love my people, my creatures, I finally found some creatures and they’re mine and I won’t EVER let them go HAHAHA